Ever caught yourself, standing on your porch, lost in your thoughts? Wandering around in the limitless abyss of your mind as you try to place yourself (like you would with pieces of a Jigsaw puzzle) in a spot, that has been created for you by society or that friend, or that partner? Feeling ‘blameful’ you feel it isn’t worth it to hang around others, you withdraw to your secret place, in a bid to hide from the world and sulk? You are probably trying so hard to be someone else just because you have a flawed past or have made mistakes. Mistakes which have caused you to reject your self and don a mask instead?
The world as we know it, has progressed to a whole new level over the years and is still morphing into a great ball of gigantic complexities, with the daily development of science and technology. Man is not left out of these mass of complexities as we all in one way or the other try to catch up with the racing developments, which seem to increase its pace every second. With all these happenings painted in this light, we have been deluded into shedding ourselves and becoming fictional characters. Fictional characters which have been deemed perfect by society’s status quo, but which really are a mirage and a figment of our imaginations only, which stand no chance against the winds of change but fade away like smoke in an harmattan wind. And sadly, this Is what we strive so hard to be. Losing our true selves as we go on this goose chase.
Now, with the aim of reaching the deepest, darkest parts of our minds, which in turn generally steer our being into motion, it is imperative that we are schooled rather extensively on the topic of “Self – acceptance”.
Now I ask my dear readers, what is “self acceptance”? What is the big deal about self acceptance and how does it affect us? How does it affect the world we are getting to know, see and feel? How about you take a moment to ponder on these questions before we delve deeper into the wonders of self acceptance.
First, what is self? You’ve probably noticed how this seems to have been made the topic of discuss, ofcourse with “acceptance” in tow. Well, what is it? What does this four-letter word, which seems to be a key ingredient in shaping our lives and world for the better mean?
Philosophical father, Socrates and his disciples; Plato and Descartes, have extensively spoken about what self is and what it entails. Without delving into much of the philosophical world and drifting from our little talk, Self is simply summarised by the philosophical geniuses as, the total and complete make-up of a being. It doesn’t stop there as they go on to say further that, self is made up of the material substance (physical body), and the non material substance (soul). Socrates was said to believe that, the soul was eternal, never changing, while the physical body was mortal and subject to change.
All these being taken into consideration, we all have to know that we all have different selves irrespective of our similarities. Even machines have got different serial or identification numbers despite being the same product or brand. We all come into this world different. Everyone brought in in their own unique ways and with different abilities. I would dare say it’s all part of some divine plan. Won’t you agree? It’s also important that you note that every self, equipped with different abilities, are all equal and on a neutral line. That is, non greater than the other but each placed strategically on this earth to achieve a greater goal.
Self acceptance on the other hand is accepting who you are, (irrespective of what people might say or do) after you have discovered yourself. Knowing that there isn’t any one out there like you and utilizing your self discovery for the benefit of mankind in any little way you can, and this can only take place when you’ve come to accept your true self.
However, acceptance of one’s true self has got different levels; Making peace with the past, owning the present and bracing for the future while planning ahead.
Making peace with the past entails, accepting your wrongs and being genuinely sorry about them. Making peace with people you might have wronged. Forgiving yourself and moving forward knowing that your past can’t reach you no more.
As for owning the present, it means being you for who you truly are. No fakes, no masks just you being better than yesterday and polishing yourself for days to come.
Bracing for the future entails preparedness for what tomorrow could be, arming yourself with the thoughts that you can take on whatever and whenever with this special unique ability you alone possess. Once you start to act on these, your view of the world changes and broadens. You discover new things about yourself you never knew existed, (like a superhero first discovering his/her power) you quit existing and start living. Self acceptance takes a lot of bravery and mind power, and once you learn to accept your true self whilst acting in good faith, the world changes just a teeny weeny bit, and for the better in the long run.
Remember, be you because no one else can.